How to Give a Tantric Lingam Massage
In Tantra, the penis is called the Lingam, which in Sanskrit can be translated as "Wand of Light." A Lingam massage is a massage of the male genitals using a large variety of strokes and grips. The goals of the Lingam massage are to honor your man's Lingam and to help him to expand his ability to receive pleasure.
The Lingam Massage
Background Information:
The Sanskrit word for the male sexual organ is Lingam (pronounced LING-AHM, [LING rhymes with sing]) and is loosely translated as "Wand of Light." Its meaning is different in intention from the typical Western view of the penis (i.e., Cock, Prick, Dong, Dick, etc., words that may come from a limited perspective, depending on the intent of their usage). In Tantra/Sacred Sexuality, the Lingam is respectfully viewed and honoured, a "Wand of Light" that channels creative energy and pleasure.
The purpose of the Lingam Massage is to create a space the receiver to relax, and receive expanded pleasure from his Lingam. His partner (the giver) experiences the joy of facilitating and witnessing the man surrendering to his softer, gentler side. The Lingam Massage can be used as a form of safer sex (when latex gloves are used) and is an excellent process to build trust and intimacy. It is often used to help men heal from negative sexual conditioning and trauma.
Orgasm is not the goal of the Lingam massage although it is often a pleasant and welcome side effect. The goal is to massage the Lingam, also including testicles, perineum and Sacred Spot (the equivalent to the female G-spot), and allow the man to surrender to a form of pleasure he may not be used to. From this perspective both receiver and giver relax into the massage.
Men need to learn to RELAX and RECEIVE. Traditional sexual conditioning has the man in a doing and goal oriented mode. The Lingam Massage allows the man to experience his softer, more receptive side and experience pleasure from a non-traditional perspective.
Preparation:
Take a relaxing bath or shower. Take your time and breathe deeply. Conscious, relaxed breathing will take you out of your mental process and will get you more into your feelings. Relax your belly and let go of the tension that most of us hold there.
Go to the bathroom before beginning the massage. The best results occur when the bowels and bladder are empty.
Let go of your thoughts and connect with your partner through hugging, holding, eye gazing (looking into each other's eyes for an extended time), bringing both of you to a place of relaxation and trust.
Procedure:
Have the receiver lie on his back with pillows under his head so he can look up at his partner (giver). Place a pillow, covered with a towel, under his hips. His legs are to be spread apart with the knees slightly bent (pillows or cushions under the knees will also help) and his genitals clearly exposed for the massage.
The giver sits cross-legged between the receivers' legs.
Before contacting the body, begin with deep, relaxed breathing. Gently massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, chest, nipples, etc., to get the receiver to relax. Remind the receiver to breathe deeply and to sink deeper into relaxation.
Pour a small quantity of a high-quality oil (or water-based lubricant when using latex gloves) on the shaft of the Lingam and testicles. Begin gently massaging the testicles, taking care to not cause pain in this sensitive area. Massage the scrotum gently, causing it to relax. Massage the area above the Lingam, on the pubic bone. Massage the Perineum, the area between the testicles and anus. Take your time. You are giving a massage to an often neglected area of the body.
CAVEAT - Do not mix oil-based products with latex.
Massage the shaft of the Lingam. Vary the speed and pressure. Gently squeeze the Lingam at the base with your right hand, pull UP and slide off and then alternate with your left hand. Take your time doing this, right, left, right, left, etc. Then, change the direction by starting the squeeze at the head of the Lingam/ penis and then sliding DOWN and off. Again, alternate with right and left hands.
Massage the head of the Lingam as if you are using an orange juicer. Massage all around the head and shaft. In Tantra there are many nerve endings on the Lingam that correspond to other parts of the body. It is said many ailments can be cured by receiving a good Lingam Massage.
NOTE: The Lingam may or may not go soft as you perform this technique. Do not worry if it doesn't get hard again. You will probably find that it will get hard, then go soft, get hard again, etc., which is a highly desirable Tantric experience, like riding a wave, bobbing up and down. Hardness and Softness are two ends of the pleasure spectrum.
If it appears that the receiver is going to ejaculate, back off, allowing the Lingam to soften a little before resuming the massage. Do this several times, coming close to ejaculation, and then backing off. Remember, the goal is not orgasm in and of itself. Men can learn the art of ejaculatory mastery and control by coming close to ejaculation and then backing off on the stimulation. Deep breathing is key here and will soften the urge to ejaculate. Eventually ejaculatory mastery will allow you to make love as long as you want and you can become multi-orgasmic without losing a drop of semen. Orgasm and ejaculation are two different responses that you can learn to separate. The result is a very expanded sex life.
Find and massage the male Sacred Spot. There are two ways to do this.
One is by finding the spot midway between the testicles and anus. There is a small indentation about the size of a pea or maybe larger. Be gentle and push inward. He will feel the pressure deep inside and it may be intensely painful at first. Eventually, as this area is worked on and softened, he will be able to expand his orgasms and master ejaculatory control. You can massage his Lingam with your right hand and massage his Sacred Spot with your left hand. Try pushing in on this spot when he nears ejaculation. It is aptly named the Million Dollar Point in Taoism.
The other way to access the Sacred Spot is through the anus. Many men, especially heterosexual men, are uncomfortable at first as a result of negative sexual conditioning. Be careful here and use lubrication. The key is to go slow and be very gentle. Make sure he is breathing as you slip a finger from your left hand into the anus about an inch or so. Then crook the finger back in a "come here" gesture. You will feel the prostate gland. Vary the pressure and speed of massage. He may want stimulation of the Lingam as you massage the Sacred Spot. Back off on the Lingam as he approaches orgasm and increase the pressure on the Sacred Spot.
Sometimes the man may have strong emotions come up during access to the Sacred Spot. He may cry and remember a traumatic event from his past. You, the giver, are in a place of trust and intimacy. Allow him to feel his emotions and be very loving, not trying to console or fix him, just let him feel whatever he needs to. Encourage him to scream, cry, moan, sob, if it feels appropriate. Be the best friend and healer he could have in that moment.
Ending the Massage:
If he chooses to let go and ejaculate, encourage him to breathe deeply during the orgasm. It will blow his mind, especially if he has come close and held back at least SIX times before ejaculating. Holding back six times charges up the sexual battery with tremendous energy. It is then his choice as to where he wants to send this energy -- out with their ejaculate (the prevailing paradigm) or inward for other uses (men who master ejaculation are able to channel this energy into other areas of their being).
When he feels complete with the massage gently remove your hands and allow him to lie there quietly. You may want to snuggle up together or you can leave the room and let him drift off into a meditative state. Allow him to fully experience his childlike innocence and magnificent male beauty.
Have fun with this technique and share it with your friends and loved ones
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Jase Bless
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I am fascinated by relationships and how we can make them closer and stronger. That's what led me to explore Tantra, which teaches couples how to develop strong physical, emotional, and spiritual connections to their partners through lovemaking. I welcome comments on my posts and will reply when appropriate. Comments are moderated, however, so they won’t appear until I’ve approved them. I do not teach Tantra classes or conduct private Tantra sessions, but, if you have other questions or would like to exchange links, you can contact me .
HE WAS TRAINED AND GAIN HIS MASSAGE CERTIFICATION BY ONE OF THAILAND TOP MASSAGE SCHOOL '' INTERNATIONAL TRAINING MASSAGE SCHOOL.
Courses are taught in English. ITM style focus on flowing movements, sensitivity/awareness and tailor-made techniques to suit individual needs. We believe everybody is different and encourage our students to adjust their techniques to suit individual needs and body conditions.
How to Give a Tantric Lingam Massage
In Tantra, the penis is called the Lingam, which in Sanskrit can be translated as "Wand of Light." A Lingam massage is a massage of the male genitals using a large variety of strokes and grips. The goals of the Lingam massage are to honor your man's Lingam and to help him to expand his ability to receive pleasure.
The setting and your attitude are what make a Lingam massage a special experience for your man. Prepare a quiet, preferably dim, space with a bed, a futon mattress, or a blanket and pillows on the floor. The temperature in the room should be a little warmer than normal because you will both be nude. Lighting candles or an oil lamp in the room will keep the lighting subdued and also help generate heat. Your oills and lubricants should be within easy reach. Try to get spill-proof bottles and use plastic rather than glass. Make sure that you have a couple of hours where you won't be disturbed.
Begin by breathing together. Stand or sit face-to-face. Embrace or hold hands, look into each other's eyes, and breathe deeply into the belly. Continue looking into his eyes and breathing with him. If you find he is holding his breath, place your hand on his lower belly and remind him to breathe from that place, to "fill his belly" with his breath.
Next, have him lie face down and begin giving him a full body massage. After about 10 minutes, ask him to turn over, and then continue the massage. Advance the massage slowly toward the inner thighs and pelvis until he is breathing deeply from his belly and his body is fully relaxed.
Then, as a show of respect for his male power, ask permission to touch his Lingam. Simply ask, "May I touch your Lingam?" or, if he is more familiar with Tantric terms, "May I touch your Wand of Light?" If he gives you permission, pour a small quantity of massage oil or water-based lubricant on his Lingam and testicles. Rub the oil or lubricant into his skin, beginning at the top of the inner thighs and moving into the crease where his legs meet the pelvis floor. Using slow, steady motions. work along the connecting bone and muscles, releasing tension as you go.
Next, massage above the Lingam, on the pubic bone. Rock your hand over this place, feeling the bone beneath the muscle and skin. Then, move on to the scrotum, gently pulling and kneading his testicles. You will need to pay very close attention to his responses here and encourage him to tell you what is just right for him. Some men can't stand to have their testicles touched at all, while others enjoy stronger handling. Start gently and slowly add pressure, rather than the other way around.
From his testicles, move your hand down to massage his perineum, sometimes called the "sacred spot." Locate the small indentation, about the size of a dime, halfway between the testicles and anus. You can use downward strokes from his Lingam to his anus or a circular motion. Circle and pull at the tissues and gently push inward on the spot with your finger. Since the spot may feel painful at first, only increase pressure as much as he is comfortable with.
Finally, place your hand on his Lingam. As you massage the shaft, gently squeeze his Lingam at the base with your right hand, and pull up, sliding completely off. Then do the same with your left hand—squeeze his Lingam at the base, and pull up, sliding completely off. Then do this again with your right, then your left, and so on. After a while, change directions—slide alternating hands from the top down to the base. Then, take the Lingam between both hands and rub your hands quickly back and forth, as you wanted to start a fire. Hold his Lingam by the head and gently shake it back and forth. Thoroughly massage the head by cupping it in your palm and turning your wrist, making "juicing" motion (as if you are juicing a lemon). Move from the Lingam to the testicles to the perineum and back again, noting his responses.
If, at any point, your man seems close to ejaculation, slow your movements to reduce stimulation and let him cool down before beginning again. If he is very close, but not past the "point of no return," you may be able to delay his ejaculation by squeezing the tip of his Lingam between your thumb and forefinger. Squeeze very firmly and hold it for about thirty seconds. Encourage him to take deep breaths while you do this. Moving to the sacred spot is another way to delay ejaculation. If he starts to feel close, decrease stimulation on the Lingam and increase stimulation on the sacred spot, which should help decrease the pressure to ejaculate.
If you hold back his orgasm six times, a tremendous amount of sexual energy will be stored, which he can either retain and circulate throughout other parts of his body or release. If he chooses to ejaculate, his orgasm will probably be much more intense than usual. Keep reminding him to take deep breaths even as he ejaculates. When the massage is complete, slowly remove your hands and allow him time to relax and savor the pleasure he has just received.
When personal Tantra instruction is either inconvenient or too expensive, Al Link and Pala Copeland's Sexual Mastery Course and Kerry and Diane Riley's Ultimate Home Tantra Course are two excellent self-teaching courses. I highly recommend either of these courses for those who can't find a local Tantra teacher, attend a Tantra workshop, or just want to explore Tantra in the privacy of their own home.
